“One double shot espresso for Tara” said a bland voice from behind the counter. Working on Christmas eve was hard on everyone and it showed.
She fumbled out of her chair, bumping her knee, dropping her phone then picking it up. The scarf carelessly placed around her neck, slipped off. “Not now” She said, picking it up. The rebellious streak of white hair she had captured under a clip took this moment to fall to her face. She pushed it behind her ear firmly.
“This day could use a double shot” she grumbled almost running into someone as she made her way to get her coffee.
She knew what she wanted to write but the words in her head were on a mutiny. This had been a common occurrence for last couple of years. A thick sediment of life laden with grief had slowed her down. She just sat there, staring at the blank screen holding the warm cup in her cold hands.
“Bad night?” A man from the next table asked
“Deadline chasing me” she said not even looking away from the screen of her laptop
“You mean you are chasing a deadline” he said
“yes, that” she said, still uninterested.
“Loosen up a little, Grinch. It’s Christmas after all” the man teased.
She looked up, angry words now queuing up in her head ready to be blasted off in his direction.
Her face went white looking at his face.
“I thought you were dead” she managed to say
“Because I used to say I would die if you left me?” he smiled “Apparently it does work like that!”
“I know it doesn’t work like that” she said, awkwardly.
“But you didn’t know this when you left me” he chuckled, pulling the chair in front of her.
“That was an eternity and a day ago, Sam. I haven’t heard from you in decades.” She was almost apologetic.
“Neither have I” he replied
“I couldn’t. I thought you hated me” she went on
“I did” He said, still stoic
“Did?!” she was a little surprised.
“Of course I hated you Tara, you took my forever from me. After you were gone, I hated everyone and everything and myself for a long time. I spent months going through the may be’s. May be it was my fault, may be it was you, may be we were never meant to be, may be it was God, destiny..I scratched them all off.” he said softly while his eyes screamed “I found no answers, I let it go. I let you go”
She said nothing. She couldn’t.
“I looked you up a few years ago. You know that feeling you get when you touch the scab of an old wound? Dry but alive. That’s how it felt. Looking at you sparkle made me proud, I knew I never hated you, I just hated life without you.” He took a sip out of her coffee
“It’s cold” she signalled at the cup
“Yeah like you are” He tittered “What’s been up with you recently, with this whole brooding, grieving, loner thing? I know life happened. I know its hard, but we got to keep living Timtim, we got to keep loving”
She had hated being called that, but he had done it anyway because he thought was a clever pun but more because it bugged her.
“Why are you here, Sam?”
“I am here because may be it was time for me to reach out..”
“One double shot espresso for Tara” said a bland voice from behind the counter. Working on Christmas morning was hard on everyone and it showed.
“May be what belongs to you, finds a way. May be forever is real. May be..” she typed on her laptop, smiling as she fumbled out of her chair.